QUICK GET ME PEN AND PAPER!

I have a bright idea! Well not really because it aint an idea, well for me in my situation it is. Invent a time machine for me please, or teach me how to control time. Yes? School is getting closer and I kind of want it to get here and then I don't. This is my last year.... I need more time to spend with him, AND the closer I get to college the more I start questioning if I really want those careers. I mean of course I do, but what if it doesn't go right for me. To much thinking going on right now. AHHHHH! I've been very lazy lately. I have a list of things I want to do and I've so far done none. I need money for a lot of things. Why exactly do we even have money? I think the world would be better if we had no money. We can still have everything we have right now, but we wouldn't have to buy them. Instead we just walk in and walk out with what we want. I don't know I'm making it confusing, but somehow you should get the idea. Money isn't really needed, but well the world is greedy. Everyone wants power, but look at where it has put us. I'm going to make a list of the things I want to do maybe that'll help with the to do list. Since it's all in my head and well I tend to forget things.


your blogger,

Lizz

p.s ireallycan'twaittilthursdayimexcited!

djdksdjl

"Pick a hand, any hand, take a chance." Life is about taking chances you can't let those things pass you by or you'll just see you're life pass with them. Maybe I'm wrong about this. A person once told me "life is a game" and in a game you take alot of chances. So one equals the other one, right? May I ask you something? Why do you hate chances so much then? "Take life by the horns" I've also heard and well I believe in every saying there is about life. "Life is a bitch" ha yea it is, but what fun will it be if it wasn't. You're satisfied when you've worked so hard for something and you get what you wanted and sometimes something even better. I've been thinking alot about life and well I've come to a point where I want to get as much as possible out of life, since we will never be satisfied with what we have might as well try to see if we can reach it.

Don't let nobody tell you, your life is over,
Be every color that you are,
Into the rush now,
You don't have to know how___aly and aj

One thing I've noticed is that life is about baby steps, you can't rush into something and expect everything to go well. You have to take it one step at a time. If you get lost there's always somehting called a map. Like I've said before you make life what you want it to be, everyone has their own meaning of life.

Girl, put your records on, tell me your favourite song
You go ahead, let your hair down
Sapphire and faded jeans, I hope you get your dreams,
Just go ahead, let your hair down.
You're gonna find yourself somewhere, somehow.__corrine bailey

confused

I feel terribly sick, not like going to the doctor sick just emotionally sick you can say. Well not really, but its like this feeling of irritation. I'm not happy about everything I do. Kinda frustrating don't you think. I feel like punching someone so bad! I can't pretend to be strong anymore, it's really tiring pretending I know exactly what I want. I'm as lost as the next person. I'm tired. I'm frustrated.

awful, horrible, annoying, sleepy, and hot

So today I was woken up by heavy drilling and hammering. What a nice way to wake up right? I still didn't want to wake up though, so I tried to drown out all the noise and just close my eyes. Well then my dad came in wating me to call someone and I did. The thing though is the phone stayed next to me and people kept calling. I fely like throwing the phone across the room, but well my phone is already kinda broken so I kept it under my bed. I finally suceeded in falling asleep when the phone rings again and snaps me from my really good dream. It turned out to be my aunt saying I have to pick up my cousin from summer school, and that she couldn't do it because she was at work and she couldn't close the resturant. It was funny though because she asked me if I was asleep and I answer no in a wierd sleepy voice.By the way, I'm not use to waking up early anymore, I end up waking up like around 1 or 12 and she called me at 10! Well I got up and changed and brushed my teeth in a hurry, I didn't mind alot since I wanted to go to Walmart to buy something. The school was very lonely so I didn't have to wait for cars to hurry and pick the kids up. We went to Walmart and ofcourse she was terribly scared her mom would know she wasn't at home taking care of her siblings, but I told her to just tell the truth to her mom if she calls. Ofcourse my aunt calls and you could hear her yelling, I told my cousin to pass me the phone and I told her not to be getting pissed at her that her younger kids would be fine. Anyways there like what 13 and 8, they can take care of themselves. We stole somethings and bought one item, so we are giving back to the economy. I'm to poor to be paying taxes and $1.87 for one stupid bottle of paint. I dropped her off and I went home to the heavy hot temperature of my house. Since they broke down my wall we couldn't leave the air conditioner on since we are wasting light, and like I said we are far to poor to be wasting cool air. BUT! that's not the worst part. My little neighbors came in like it was there home, touching this, eating that, playing with that, and breaking things. I'm not use to little kids since its just me and my younger brother which is 13, so he doesn't annoy me alot. These kids I swear OMG there annoying. They kept wanting me to make them bracelets since they saw that I had beads in a jar and they kept playing with the dog when all my dog wanted to do was sleep, so he hid under my bed. Lucky him. The kids and me getting annoyed made it worse and I felt like I was cooking in my own home. All I wanted to do was go to sleep, but with all the noise I couldn't. In and out, I swear those kids have ants in there pants. This has been the most annoying day I've had in so long. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
They still haven't finished my parents room, so again tomorrow is going to be the same thing. *sigh* I hate summers when its 104 degrees outside.

your blogger,

Lizz

p.s imissedyoutoday

thoughts

Hush don't speak a word about the dreams that I live for. It hurts to reach you when I’m down. Don’t speak again; I’m still waiting for my turn. It hurts to reach you when I’m down -Eyes Set to Kill.

Why do people say we're to old to believe in something? Whats wrong with believing in fairy tales? I have huge dreams, people have told me this before. "You'll never reach them Liz. Its to big to become real life." Why is it too big? I wish to be alot of things and I know I'll reach them someday. If I don't well then I guess I didn't fight hard enough. "You're an idealist Liz, they don't go very far in life. Wake up liz and see that this is reality." Well since when can't dreams and reality be one? Alot of people have done it, why can't I. Even my mom says it, but well she never got the apportunity I have, and that is the reason she came to this country, right? To give me and my brother a better life. Well thats what I'm gonna do, make the best with what I'm given and build up from there. I want to be a writer, but my mom says that is no stable career. Of course it aint and I don't want one, if I did I would've been something normal like a doctor, a nurse or a teacher, but how boring is that. I want to wake up everyday with my fairy tales and face the challanges of the day. If I get something ordinary what fun is there in that? NOTHING. I love that I'm a child inside, I believe in magic worlds and I see it as a good thing. Others say its a bad thing, I should grow up and face reality. I think I'm grown up and I know the reality of things. I love it when people are confused about what they want to be, bacause I know they'll find it and when they do it'll be something they enjoy. I think everyone should get lost, you're bound to get found and it'll be very interesting. Well I don't know if this made any sense but oh well.

your blogger,

Lizz

p.s.iloveyou

3-2=

Warp Tour is this Sunday, I hope I get to go. I haven't been able to sleep at night, I toss and I turn all night until around 4 or 5. I end up waking up at 1 after that. There's this wierd thing I keep seeing when I drift. Its a red door on a stone house with gold numbers 365 going up and down the door, I wonder what that means. I haven't read a single book in a long time. It gets me frusturated. I think I know why....

your blogger,
Lizz

Istillneedtogetajob!